Hello? Hey there you are! Haven't been on in a while. Have a touch of the flu so while I have evacuated my bowels and my stomach I figured I would evacuate some thoughts as well. Comic- Con 2011 is almost upon us and I am here to share a series of suggestions. I'll be on from time to time to update them but here is today's.

For those of you who will be new to SDCC this year here are some suggestions: know your fan types. Seriously this can save you time and embarrassment. There are many types of people and fanboys/fangirls that you will run into at Comic-Con. 1) follow the crowds - if you are new Comic-Con can be a bit overwhelming but depending on what you want to do there it doesn't need to be. If you want to watch the panels (the biggest of which is in Hall H) you will want to arrive very early in the morning. As your facing the convention center you will see a grassy area off to the left. There may or may not already be people there depending on how early you get there. As long as you already have your ticket this is where you will want to be. Here's some things to know. Don't be a dick! Wait in line just like everybody else and don't try to jump in with the crowd as they start letting people in. We all waited and you need to wait also. Listen to the police officers. They are there to keep the peace and keep things moving and orderly. Do not listen to security. Follow the others that are going where you want to go and do what they do. Now this doesn't mean to be a dick to security but as anyone that has attended Comic-Con in the past can tell you the security at the con is a bit of a joke and the guards are completely arbitrary with what they will and won't allow. So to review don't be an asshole to them, just ignore them and go with the flow. 2) do your research ahead of time. I cannot stress this enough there is nothing like being prepared when you get in those doors. Know what you want to see and where you want to go, where it is taking place and at what time. You could try asking directions from security (are you not paying attention to what I just told you???) DO NOT TALK TO SECURITY! Even if they don't just stare at you like you are speaking Klingon (which you might be as this is Comic-Con) chances are they'll send you to the wrong place anyway. Seriously DON'T ENGAGE THEM! They are there to make sure everyone has a badge out and turned in the right direction, preventing you from going through a door to the outside that would get you to your destination in a timely and efficient manner, nit letting you back into Hall H without going back through the line even though you just stepped outside for a smoke and then to make sure everyone moves up and in in Hall H to make room for everyone. That is all they are there for. If you must ask for directions/information there will be some rules. If you are a Twilighter you really shouldn't talk to anyone but the other Twilighters. No one at the con likes you. You have made it harder for fans that have been coming for years to get in and if you (like me) were there when Twilight first came to Comic-Con then your ears are probably still ringing from the shrieking of thousands of young girls. Now if you are one of the aforementioned Twilighters and you must, absolutely must, ask for help and none of your fellow "team" members are around there are a select few groups that may be gracious enough to help out. 1) The Browncoats - we (yes I consider myself one of them) still believe in chivalry (Cap'n) and would probably be willing to give you the assistance you require without to much guff. 2) Star Wars fans - I also consider myself to be Star Wars fan and I think we may be the best fans (suck it Trekkies). There is one caveat to asking for help from the costumed Star Wars fan. You need to speak with a Jedi (look for robes of tan and brown, not black) the Jedi order is one of peace and goodwill to the all in the galaxy and it is part of their code of honor to help those in need. DO NOT ASK FOR HELP FROM A STORMTROOPER! Even if they acknowledge your presence you are more than likely just going to receive their customary response of "move along". Here's a paradox to the whole Twilight thing that I find amusing. If you were to ask a question of one of the Twilighters and you are not one of them they will be completely rude to you unless of course they are with their mom and that conversation would go a little something like this: "Jenny that man just asked you where ballroom 20 is". "I know mom but he's not part of the "team" and I told you only to call me Bella, ugh". Yeah that's pretty much verbatim. And while I'm on the Kristen Stewart thing what is the deal with her "thousand yard stare" ? Seriously she is a little frightening with her dead lifeless eyes and face devoid of any human emotion. I am 100% sure that in a previous life she was a marine corps sniper. You wont talk me out of that one. Now a few words about Hall H. I won't give all my tips (I've got to save a few for myself) but here are some important ones. 1) try to go to the bathroom before you get in. Seriously the bathroom in Hall H is a wretched hive of scum and villainy. I mean everything is wet in there all the time. Let's face it nerds aren't the cleanest people. If you must use the bathroom in there the best time to go is in between programs because there are usually a lot of people that will leave between programs and there is a short window between when they let in the new people for the next program. Try to pack in your own food. You will find this advice all around the Internet but it needs to be reiterated. Not only is the food at Comic-Con ridiculously over priced it may also upset your stomach forcing you to sit on a wet toilet (honestly why is EVERYTHING wet in that bathroom) in Hall H because you HAD to have that $8 slice of greSy con pizza while all your friends enjoyJoss Whedon previewing the Avengers.

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